When Grace is Enough

There are days when I feel accomplished. Days when the house is clean, the kids are fed and showered and everything feels peaceful. Days when my children are kissed and told they are loved, when the laughter, the singing and the dancing fill our rooms and our hearts. On those days I feel like I've done it right ("it" being this motherhood thing, of course).  Those are the days that I feel that God would have given me a high five.

Then, of course, there are days when everything I've described above doesn't seem to happen and I feel as though I'm fighting a battle that has already been lost. Days when every decision, no matter it's simplicity, seem to weigh a ton on my shoulders.  On those days the tears are many, the anger is real and the joy is lost.

I remember one of those "bad" days. In fact it had started out as a good day, and since it was a good day I decided I wanted to treat the boys by taking them out to eat (if those boys could eat out everyday, they would be in heaven). On that day though, it seemed that they were just not listening, and so in my frustration I told them I would no longer do what I had promised them.  And even though I had just broken my word to them, I knew that my frustrations had gotten the best of me and that in actuality I had wanted to take them out.  So while standing in my laundry room, frustrated and trying to decide whether I should change my mind again and take them out or whether I should teach them a "lesson" for not listening, I asked God what I should do.

Immediately He laid on my heart 2 Corinthians 12:9  and immediately I was reminded of God's grace.  In in those few moments as I cried out to God because of my frailed mothering, God was made perfect in my eyes. God is perfect, He's a perfect father and He's a perfect God. I am imperfect, an imperfect woman and an imperfect mother. I was able to see God for His faithfulness, to understand that his promises to me are not based on how "good" I am, but they are solely based on who He is.  And as I was reminded of that, as I was able to understand that God still blesses me even when I don't listen, I was able to share grace with my boys.

So with renewed strength I got out of the laundry room, told my boys that I had changed my mind again, and we went and enjoyed ourselves.

 

Mothering is HARD; It is full of blessings, but it is hard, so each day I have to learn to live moment by moment in God's grace and not in the successes or failures of my effort.

In what areas of your life do you feel weak? Pray about them, give them over to The Lord, but see those imperfections as an opportunity to see a perfect, holy and gracious God. 

So how will you choose to live today?